Another helping of regular Friday Flippancy, plucked from the happenings in Scotland this week.
MODified Light Bulbs
Not often we salute the Soaraway Sun but we do today. The biggest tits in the newspaper however are The MOD. A brave squaddie’s revealed that the Ministry of Defence (we tend to get worried when we hear anything about them) is purchasing bog standard light bulbs for the eye watering sum of £22 each. A light bulb, the standard visual cliche for ‘bright thinking and illuminated creativity’, for more than £100 for 5!
Even if they are particularly brilliant light bulbs, it surely highlights some un-joined up thinking at MOD? If they’re paying 30 times over the realistic price for a light bulb, how much is being spent on things that actually do cost a right few quid? Are things they’re paying £22 million for, actually only worth £650,000?
We’re sure the good people of Lossiemouth, Kinloss and Leuchars would be interested to find out who else in the procurement chain has been taking the p*ss. C’mon Liam Fox, as a Scot, you owe it to these people to sort this incredible waste.
The World’s Best Driving Roads
There is a Group on Bagging Scotland called ‘Driving Heaven’ which highlights this – it’s pretty clear that the roads of Scotland (if you forget about the woefully inept M8 and weather-induced potholes) are great driving experiences. Lots of commercials and films are shot here and telly loves to use it. We think that having the Top Gear trio of tumshies turning up now and again is a small price to pay for Scotland’s driving heaven.
It’s not just cars either. Lots of men in leather waistcoats, tight jeans and moustaches turn up for Thunder in The Glen which isn’t a Gay Pride event, it’s a massive meeting of Harley Davidson Riders and they burble up through Speyside. We’ve witnessed this, and even though some of the geezers are not exactly pin-up material, the bikes are gorgeous.
We’ve also had the Monte Carlo Rally starting from Blythswood square for the first time in over 30 years. We turned up for this and the period cars and the fact it was a crisp dry night meant it turned out to be a brilliant spectacle.
Stand by for more strange old geezers; they’re set to take over Aviemore in the late Summer of 2013. The European MG owners Club will descend on Aviemore for their big meeting, bringing over 300 cars for all over Europe. Even if there’s a lot of string-backed driving gloves, beards and the odd pipe smoker, if the sun shines, just how brilliant is this going to be?
The freedom to roam policy is something we take for granted but imagine if you’re used to living in an 0ver-congested European City. You can drive around the Highlands of Scotland, where, in reality there’s hardly a speed camera, a sleeping policeman and definitely no tolls to worry about. You can pull over, camp where you like and basically treat this magnificent wee country of ours as if it was your own back garden. If you combine this with some of the amazing Highland and Island roads there are, it’s not over-exaggerating to call Scotland Driving Heaven.
About Bloody Time
Making a meal about a big black sausage whose chief ingredient is pig’s blood may seem daft, but as Stornoway Black Pudding could be set to join Parma Ham and Stilton as a ‘protected’ food, it’s something that would be great for the Western Isles.
As we’ve said before, Stornoway’s not the bonniest toon in Ecosse, but when it comes to making Black Pudding, they are ‘The Daddy’. There’s a place in Eire called Clonakilty and they, in typical Irish fashion make a real song and dance about the local ‘famed’ Clonakilty Black Pudding. Well, we’ve tried it and it’s okay, but we reckon the Stornaway stuff has it well beaten. Never mind having it with Scallops (EVERY restaurant seems to be doing this?) if you’ve never had a bit of crisp on-the-outside, soft-on-the-inside Stornoway Black Pudding in a warm Scottish breakfast roll with a wee bit of ketchup, you’ve never lived. It’s a breakfast treat that really does make us feel sorry for vegetarians. Anyway, if this protection is granted (we’ll know sometime this weekend) it’ll give people a reason to go to Stornoway, which is also a good thing, as Stornoway needs a bit of help.
We really just wanted to write a wee bit on this because obviously highlighting the fact that Scotland does GREAT food and not all hopeless deep fried stuff is good. More importantly though, it gives us a chance to show this photo of two Western Isles girls holding two HUGE black puddings! There could be a caption competition here but we’re far too gallant to suggest going down that innuendo-strewn path.